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Chapter 1
The Body You Wake Up In
Here’s a thing no one tells you about being morbidly obese.
When I’m lying in bed, I feel completely normal. Flat on my back, blankets over me, the day not started yet — I’m just me. The same me I’ve always been. I don’t feel big. I don’t feel heavy. I don’t feel like anything is wrong at all.
Then I have to get up.
And that’s when it hits me. That’s the moment, every single morning, when I remember. Heaving myself up, swinging my legs over, planting my feet, and pushing. It takes effort you wouldn’t believe. It takes everything. And by the time I’m standing, swaying a little, catching my balance — because balance is another thing that’s gone now — I know exactly how big and how heavy I really am.
The person lying down and the person standing up are two different people. One of them is me. The other one is who the world sees.
Because that’s the truth of it, and I’m going to be honest with you from the very first page or there’s no point writing this book at all. The world does not see me. The world sees a big fat good-for-nothing woman. Something barely human. A problem. A joke. A warning. And every day I have to climb out of a body that felt perfectly normal five minutes ago and go and be that thing in other people’s eyes.
I wasn’t always this size. I’ll get to that, how it happened, and it’ll surprise you, because it surprised me and it surprised my doctor too. But that’s later. For now I just want you to sit with that gap. The gap between what I am inside and what you see outside.
Inside, I’m sharp. I’m funny. I’m nobody’s fool. I read, I write all day, I work things out that trained people missed. Inside I am completely, absolutely myself.
Outside, I’m “that woman.”
If you’ve never lived in a body like mine, I want you to really try and imagine it. Not the weight. Forget the weight for a second. I mean the gap.
Imagine waking up every morning feeling like yourself, and then having to put on a body that everyone has already decided things about before you’ve said a single word. Imagine being judged, written off, pitied and sneered at, all based on the one thing about you that isn’t the real you at all.
That’s what this book is about.
I’m going to tell you the things nobody says out loud. The chairs I check before I sit. The stares. The things I can’t do any more that you do without a thought. The things that are so personal and so undignified that most people would take them to the grave. I’m going to tell you anyway, because somebody has to, and I’ve never been one to keep too quiet.
Some of it will make you uncomfortable. Good. Some of it will make you laugh, because honestly if I didn’t laugh I’d have gone under years ago. And some of it, I hope, will make you think twice the next time you see someone like me and your face does that thing — that little flicker — before you even know you’re doing it.
I see that flicker. We all see it. We’ve been watching for it our whole lives.
So come with me. Get out of bed with me, if you dare, and feel the weight land.
This is what it’s really like.
End of chapter one. 11 more chapters and about 8,673 words in the full book.
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What's inside: 12 chapters
- 1. The Body You Wake Up In
- 2. Will the Chair Hold Me?
- 3. The Things You Never Think About
- 4. All Eyes On Me
- 5. “That Woman”
- 6. Watching Me Eat
- 7. How Did I Get Here?
- 8. What’s Really Underneath
- 9. The People Who Are Meant to Love You
- 10. The Walls Around Me
- 11. Laughing to Survive
- 12. Take a Look in Your Own Mirror
About this book
"THAT MORBIDLY OBESE WOMAN" is a general book by Leigh Ralph with 12 chapters and approximately 8,673 words. It covers key insights and practical takeaways on the topic.
This book was created using Inkfluence AI, an AI-powered book generation platform that helps authors write, design, and publish complete books.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is "THAT MORBIDLY OBESE WOMAN" about?
"THAT MORBIDLY OBESE WOMAN" is a general book by Leigh Ralph covering key insights and practical takeaways on the topic.
How many chapters are in "THAT MORBIDLY OBESE WOMAN"?
The book contains 12 chapters and approximately 8,673 words. Topics covered include The Body You Wake Up In, Will the Chair Hold Me?, The Things You Never Think About, All Eyes On Me, and more.
Who wrote "THAT MORBIDLY OBESE WOMAN"?
This book was written by Leigh Ralph and created using Inkfluence AI, an AI book generation platform that helps authors write, design, and publish books.
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